Okay, in my past post I showed this piece of art for the first time.
The artist is Teddy Kristiansen, correctly identified by Kevin Pasquino in about 0.42 seconds. This is the ten year commission. I forget the date exactly, as until this experience I didn't keep very detailed records, but once upon a time a young art collector thought he had hit upon the opportunity of a lifetime when Danish artist Teddy Kristiansen agreed to take a commission. I had been reading Starman and other books like House of Secrets and Grendel, both of which featured Teddy on art at some point. I loved his expressive and disfigured style. I thought long and hard about getting a House of Secrets inspired commission or something Grendel (Hunter? Argent? Prime?) but settled on ol' Dickie Swift, The Shade. So I paid Teddy $150 for a black and white commission of The Shade from Starman. Same story different (con?) artist. Teddy was very keen to do it and replied to my emails frequently initially. Then the cash was sent across the world and communication ceased. A cold and long silence enveloped us all. It looked like all was lost.
Eventually our enterprising Dane began a blog. The 21st century had continued to make the world a smaller place. So I emailed, emailed again and so on and so on. Then I began leaving a comment on his blog posts. Each and every time he posted I left a comment within a day or two. Nothing mean, just a compliment on the blog post and a query about my commission from 7...8...9 years ago. You get the idea. At first he replied and said he had lost the list, yadda yadda yadda. He would delete the comments and I would comment again until he replied to me. Then he stopped replying, just deleting then. Then, like bloggers the world over, his posts became less frequent and he eventually stopped blogging reliably. Maybe one a year. I would be there immediately of course, civil but persistent. But about year 8 or so the blogging stopped, replies ceased and once again silence and darkness fell over the land.
Meanwhile, other collectors had been venting their tales of woe and lost Danish. The reader is advised of this should he or she care to seek our the other tales common to this continuity. But I digress. I also do not have the time to tell those tales, only my own.
Then lo and behold, our now older art collector happened to come across a most curious site one day. Online. buried under "Media Guests" and listed as a guest of Man of Action Studios was none other than our (presumed very rich by this point) Danish (escape?) artist, Teddy Kristiansen. Surely a Man of Action would recognize a kindred spirit, so I leapt into action and emailed MoA Studios. I also left a comment on the blog wasteland. I just had to let them know how happy I was to be given the opportunity to talk to Teddy in person when the show opened. you know, like 10:01. Or whenever, I would be there reliably. Or maybe persistently is a better word. Consistently? Hmm.
Well, I guess they got the idea despite my inability to be clear and articulate. Or precise. Exact? Anyway. Teddy emailed and said, why wait I can send it last week. Sure, sure I said. Why wouldn't I believe you, you are clearly a Man of Action. And don't you know it I got the above piece in the mail a week or two before the show. The mailing included the usual shenanigans, but it got here in the end.
And I hated it.
Immediately.
Next time I will tell you why.
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2 comments:
That is one commission horror story... I commissioned a Simpsons style portrait of my family from a well known and highly regarded PRO who's worked for every major comic company. I met him at NYCC, which was the initial contact and commission discussion. On the positive side, he didn't want any money until I saw a scan of the finished product via email. I told him there was some urgency, as I'd like to have it for my 10 year wedding anniversary, which was 6 months away. He assured me I'd have it in two weeks. I had it just in time for my 11th anniversary a year and a half later... Ugh.
Thank you for the comment Robert. There is a small twist coming at the end of the story, but I have not had time to write it up yet!
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